Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Gletiquette: Tips for surviving a business lunch when you're gluten-free

Now that I've gone gluten-free, I tend to frequent two kinds of restaurants:

1. The kind that has a gluten-free menu and kitchen staff trained to follow proper procedures for cooking for and serving gluten-free patrons

2. The kind where I know waitstaff is attentive and food is rather plain, where I could say something like "I am gluten-free, so would it be a problem for the kitchen to modify this meal for me so that the croutons don't come on the salad/so that there is no bread on my dinner plate/so that the mashed potatoes come without gravy/etc?"

Today, however, I had an experience at a totally different sort of place.  It was a place I hadn't been to before--a restaurant in a fancy hotel.  I was there for a business lunch with co-workers.  I knew going into this lunch that a) there was no gluten-free menu there, and b) the food was kinda fancy.  Not surprisingly, it was a challenge for me to find something to eat there. 

I spoke to our server right away and explained my allergies and intolerances--gluten, of course, but also cream and all evergreen spices (random, I know).  I said right away that I was happy to have food very plain and that I didn't mind if they couldn't give me one part of an entree because it wasn't gluten-free--that as long as I could eat something safe, I'd be happy.  The server went back to talk to the chef, who suggested modifying one meal to make it gluten-free...and it was a meal that was primarily fish.  Which I'm not at all fond of.  So I thanked her for the suggestion and asked if we could instead modify a Cobb salad.  I asked for no chicken (because the server said the grilled chicken used in the salad was marinated, and who the heck knows if that's safe or not--they offered to substitute chicken with some plain, non-marinated turkey), no bacon (not all bacon is gluten-free), no Bleu cheese (I am totally turned off by moldy-looking cheese, so I asked for any other cheese to substitute), and no dressing (I never use salad dressing).  The good news was, the chef didn't put on any marinated chicken (and the turkey was yummy), they used Swiss instead of Bleu cheese, and there was no bacon or dressing on the salad.  Everything else that came with the salad (lettuce, tomatoes, and avocado) was there.  The bad news: For some reason, these crazy people pepper their lettuce.  Which I *hate*.  So I ended up eating the tomatoes, avocado, turkey and cheese out of the salad and leaving behind most of the peppery lettuce.  (Seriously, whose idea was it to sprinkle black pepper on nice, fresh lettuce?  The menu didn't specify this, and I wish they'd asked before adding pepper to my salad--I'd definitely have said "no thank you.")

Luckily I'd been wise enough to eat a few cheese and GF crackers before heading out for lunch, and then on the way back after lunch and the meeting, I was beyond famished, so I snacked on a few Jelly Belly jellybeans that I'd stashed in my purse.  But that's not enough food for me--that's not going to keep me sated from 9 to 5.  I don't think I'd even hung up my coat at home yet before I was reaching for the Wellaby's GF crackers!

Anyway, in light of my not awful but also not ideal dining experience today, here are a few suggestions I have for gluten-free folks attending business lunches...

* Eat beforehand.  I know it sounds silly to eat before lunch, but unless you are going to a restaurant where you KNOW you can eat safely, you may not want to count on the restaurant being able to make you anything that is both safe and yummy for you.  So always eat something before you go--protein-y snacks like nuts and cheese are things that might keep you full for longer.

* If possible, choose a restaurant that has gluten-free selections.  Of course, this isn't always possible.

* If you can't choose the restaurant, do your research before you go.  Look at their menu online.  Brainstorm what meals you could ask the staff to modify so that the food is safe for you to eat.  You may even want to call them to discuss what options you might have.  (The server I had today recommended that if I were to come back to their restaurant, call and let them know in advance so that they could prepare some chicken or another dish gluten-free for me, as long as they had a decent amount of notice about needing to do that.)

* Stash gluten-free snacks in your purse.  You may or may not need them, but it's always a good idea to have them just in case.

* Talk to your co-workers about it--to a certain degree.  The people in my department know I'm gluten-free.  Because of this, they're not surprised to see me talking with a server for several minutes, trying to figure out what meal I can have.  This also means they don't ask me questions like "why can't you eat that?" or "what's wrong with you?", which can get really annoying.  But really, you only want to talk to them about it to a certain extent.  Don't tell them what may happen if you eat glutenous food--it's not the best mealtime conversation.

* Always be polite and courteous with servers, chefs, and other restaurant staff.  This should go without saying--you should always be kind to them simply because it's the right thing to do.  But also remember that they're likely making a special effort to make your meal right for you...and don't forget that they also wield the power to royally screw it up for you.  So be nice, be thankful and gracious, tell them you appreciate their effort--and when you're the one who's leaving the tip, tip well.

* Realize that you're probably not going to have your favorite meal ever at this lunch.  Really, the goal is to get a meal that is safe for me to eat and is reasonably tasty.  I understand that many places aren't great at cooking for people who are gluten-free, so meals may not come out perfectly.  And they may not be able to modify every entree to suit your allergy/intolerance, so you'll need to be flexible and understanding.  Aim to get the best meal you can possibly get, given the circumstances. 

* There's no need to apologize for your allergy/intolerance.  You are a paying customer, and you deserve to have a meal that is prepared in a way that makes it safe for you to eat.  As long as you are courteous when you are dealing with the staff and figuring out what you can safely eat, they're not going to mind.  They want to make it right for you so that you come back--they want you to have a good experience.  So don't feel bad about it--just do your best to make the most of it.


Do you have any good tips for being gluten-free and surviving business lunches or other social functions where food is involved?  If so, feel free to leave a comment below!

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